Good morning, lovers!
It’s question and answer time!

What’s up, OP?
I’ve got a problem or, rather, I think I might have a problem. Let me give you a back story.
Been with my man for about 2 years, after about 9 months we both confessed to being into kink. I don’t mean we like to use hand cuffs every now and then. We’re a bit deeper into it than that. It’s at the point now where I can’t get off unless he is cutting me right at the moment of orgasm(not my vagina btw, just a random place like my leg or stomach). It’s the only thing that pushes me over the edge.  I’m not asking you if there’s something wrong with me because I know us humans are all so different with what turns us on and off and that there really isn’t such a thing as normal. But, logically, I know that it’s not ok to only to be able to get off that way.  It’s not ok.  I want to go back to having straight sex and being able to have an orgasm from sex or oral sex without sharp tools involved and still playing with our knives and tools every now and then.  Do you know if this is possible?  I don’t think kink has to bleed(pardon the pun) into your entire life and I think people are kinda lame when they let it. There’s no need to bring your partner on the bus on a leash. Anywho, is there anything I can do to go backwards?
– Little Miss Cuts-a-lot


Hi Little Miss Cuts-a-lot,
It’s hard for us to give you a solution to what you see as a problem. Our sexual desires are hard to control.  You are already starting to realize this.
You want what you want.  It’s like someone waking up one morning and deciding that they are only going to be attracted to people with brown hair when they’ve always been attracted to the pale beauty of blondes for their entire lives.
Ok, not the same thing at all, but do you get the comparison? I don’t think you should beat yourself up over it.  Do what feels good to you!
If you want to limit your use of cutting to achieve an orgasm, maybe you can put that option out there as a once a week thing…and just fantasize  about it the rest of the time. Re-training yourself can be tough. We’ve heard of a lot of people who only have one way to achieve an orgasm, it’s not uncommon. As long as you are extremely safe and everything that you do is consensual, we think you should embrace it.  There’s no set of rules that we all have to follow. Some people can only have an orgasm when using a vibrating toy, some while humping a pillow, some can only orgasm alone and not with a partner and some need to be peed on.  We are all so different and that’s what makes sex so much fun! Embrace your kink



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